Pwn or Be Pwned
Pure Pwnage episode 4 - "Pwn or Be Pwned" original web series

Pure Pwnage episode 4 - "Pwn or Be Pwned" original web series

Web series episode







Pwn or Be Pwned is the fourth episode of season one, and is the first episode to introduce the character "Teh_Masterer", micro battles, the infamous I Pwn Noobs shirt, and extensive camera shots not done by Kyle. The Gamer Army subplot also technically starts here.



The episode starts off with a spoof of the Halo machinima Red vs. Blue using Command & Conquer: Generals – Zero Hour, which features the random antics of the two armies, eventually leading to a full-scale conflict. The game is revealed to be a game that Kyle is playing, which Jeremy ruins by having an Overlord tank destroy all of Kyle's workers. The episode then resumes after the title credits with Jeremy having a meltdown over a loss at Zero Hour. Kyle rushes downstairs and goes outside his room, where Dave tells him that he is having a fit.

The next day, Kyle enters Jeremy's room, knocking over a keyboard, and when he questions him about his loss, Jeremy shows severe depression when he talks about how one flame tank changed his life by destroying his base. Jeremy then continues into how the forums will laugh at him, when Kyle tells him to see teh Masterer. Jeremy agrees, and once outside comments on how the sunlight burns him like the lava in Metroid. Eventually Jeremy goes to a phone booth, where he begins erratically typing on the numberpad, talking about practicing his micro. Walking past a tennis court that Jeremy likens to Pong, a woman chases the two, claiming they owe her twenty dollars for an interview.

Once they escape, Jeremy takes Kyle underground, into a dark area with a security guard. Jeremy mentions that they are here for Teh_Masterer, at which point he directs them up stairs. Once outside Teh_Masterer's room, Jeremy tells Kyle to wait outside, since there is a no noobs policy in Teh_Masterer's hideout. The scene then switches to an out of Kyle perspective as Jeremy enters the room. Teh_Masterer, an ominous figure in black is seen at the other end of the room, typing into his computer extremely fast, revealing he is playing four games at once. Without breaking stride, he questions Jeremy's reason for coming without his consent. Through dialogue, he eventually finds out that Jeremy lost, and agrees to help him train further after seeing his micro, and telling him that "a true pwner pwns all games."

The next scene features Jeremy typing at his keyboard, running around outside microing an SNES gamepad and performing Street Fighter moves, and doing jump-rope with the same SNES pad. The following scene shows Jeremy struggling to eat a bowl of rice under Teh_Masterer's watch using, again, an SNES gamepad. After giving in to his hunger and chowing down a mouthful, teh Master makes him start over, where he does better the second time around. The next scene shows Jeremy meditating at a pond in a relaxed position, with a keyboard right in front of him.

The following scene shows a circular room (later Teh_Masterer's training room) where Jeremy is alone practicing his micro on a keyboard. Without warning, the view turns to black and white as smoke rolls in and Teh_Mastererapproaches with a keyboard. Accepting this invitation to fight, Jeremy slams the desk to bring the keyboard to his hand and hops over the desk. The two exchange gestures, before readying a strike. When the keyboards collide, an escape (ESC) key falls to the ground. Jeremy looks quizzically at it, before attacking again, only to have both attacks blocked. Jeremy narrowly dodges a swipe at his head before relentlessly attacking again three times. After all are blocked, teh Masterer proceeds to push Jeremy off, before the two ready their weapons for another round.

As the two gaze at each other, Teh_Masterer uses the cord of his keyboard to trip Jeremy, causing him to lose his balance and drop his keyboard. Teh_Masterer throws his own away, and laughing, starts to use his real life RTS Style micro. Jeremy gets up and starts using his own style to fight back. After a temporary stalemate, Jeremy succeeds in pushing Teh_Masterer back. He then switches to Console Style. With a diabolical laugh, Teh_Masterer begins to push Jeremy back, switching to Arcade Style in the process. Jeremy pushes himself upright and begins to micro harder, eventually causing Teh_Masterer to go up in smoke.

Upon approaching the body, Jeremy removes the mask on Teh_Masterer's face, revealing that he is actually Jeremy. At which point, Kyle's voice is heard as Jeremy wakes up in the hallway outside of Teh_Masterer's room. Kyle comments on his new shirt, but Jeremy leaves, knowing that he has to get back to pwning noobs. The song I Feel Like Pwning Noobs is played as Jeremy recounts Teh_Masterer's words. Jeremy then is shown going to Gamestop, where he buys Half Life 2.


  • How Dave got into Kyle's house is unknown, unless Jeremy invited him in before losing.
  • When Jeremy enters Teh_Masterer's room, you can see under the door where Kyle was about a second earlier that there are no shoes where he would be standing.
  • Whereas gamer micro is portrayed as blue (or red, if evil), all micro shown in the circular room fight is invisible.
  • The idea of Teh_Masterer being a ninja of some kind is viable, seeing as how he has some mastery or knowledge of Genjutsu, shown when Jeremy approaches his body and finds his face.
  • Kyle makes no mention of how long he was waiting for Jeremy to come out of the room. This could mean that the entire training session was just a dream, with Jeremy walking in, and then walking out, or that Kyle left to do something else. However, even if it is a dream, Teh_Masterer is still a real person, since he appears in later episodes, as does his circular room. Kyle also referred to him before traveling to his hideout (although he didn't truly know where it was).
    • It could also just be oversight.

See alsoEdit

Episodes of Pure Pwnage
Web Series Season 1 The Life of a Pro GamerGirlsFPS DougPwn or Be PwnedM8sImapwnu of AzerothMMO GrrlLanageddonThe Story of DaveTeh Best Day Everi heart u in rlGame Over
Web Series Season 2 Old HabitsLifestylesT-BagDuty CallsJust the Guys
TV Series Season 1 The Life of a Pro GamerJobsGirlsRock OnWho's Afraid of the Big Bad Doug?The Day the LAN Centre Stood StillLosing to a n00bPwnageddon
Pro at Cooking Dave's StewDave's Seafood StirfryDave's Ass Kickin Alfredo PastaDave's Pimpin PizzaDave's Mouthwatering ChiliDave's BBQ SteakDaves Eggplant ParmesanDave's Succulant Sushi